Showing posts with label confessions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label confessions. Show all posts

Saturday, December 12, 2009

College Confessions: "Finals? What Finals?"

I'll bet you read that title and now think "Oh, Katie didn't study so she's pretending she forgot finals." 

Nope. I'm not taking them. 

You see, I am a special delicate flower and petitioned for an Incomplete in both microbiology and chemistry, so I now have a year left to finish both of those classes. An Incomplete basically means that I keep all of the grades that I have right now, and all of the work, but have another year to catch up and take any remaining tests (my chem final, micro lab exam 2, and micro final). Incompletes are granted to students that are unable to continue or keep up their grades in a class due to circumstances beyond their control. 

I did this because I simply do not think that I can finish these courses in the time remaining (school ends December 17th) and maintain B's in both, due to my gastrointestinal issues. (IBS/Gastritis/Heartburn/Acid Reflux/whathaveyou, plus the anxiety that I get that makes my stomach/IBS issues worse when I get stressed). This was not a decision made lightly; when my microbiology teacher told me about an option for Incomplete a few weeks ago I thanked her and said that knowing that would probably alleviate my stress levels, but that I thought I could handle it. 

. . . and I couldn't, not really, not and get the grades I want (need). I feel kind of happy about this decision, because ohmigod the stress isn't so bad; but then I feel bad about it, because I never ever have failed a class or not finished a test and what will people think and will this even make a difference to my grades, and that just leads to its own anxiety. But not too bad. (I hope). My stomach is actually acting up a little bit today, when it has been pretty good for about a week now, on and off. 

So I'm curled up in a chair, listening to the rain outside as I sip my peppermint tea (it's an anti-spastic!) and watch the Christmas tree lights twinkle while I wonder at what exactly has happened to the single-minded, driven, completely healthy girl I used to be.